season 4, episode 23, “demons”
“demons” does not mention scully’s cancer, but it is not lacking in the angst department whatsoever. and that angst is mulder angst. we all know how far mulder would go for the truth and in this episode we see him go pretty far. it begins with him waking up in a strange place with blood all over him. he calls scully (naturally) and she comes running (naturally). mulder can’t remember anything. they discover that rounds have been fired from his gun and that the blood on his shirt is not his. mulder is being obstinate and not listening to scully’s advice. scully is equally stubborn at times, but when mulder is, it is out in the open. scully is secretly obstinate to mulder’s help.
they find the bodies of a husband and a wife. it’s looking very much like mulder killed them and he is apprehended by the local police. scully knows that mulder didn’t do it. that says a lot. she always needs hard evidence to believe something, but here her faith in mulder is all she needs. mulder seems to believe that he did it and is trying to accept the chance that he actually did. scully is not going to give up. she investigates while mulder sits in jail. an officer’s suicide at the precinct gives her a lead. mulder is released and pursues it, as well. scully keeps trying to get him to go to the hospital, but he is headstrong. she pulls out all the stops and that doesn’t even work. “you’re a danger to yourself and to me.” she knows how much he cares for her and she tries to use it to stop his manic spiral. but, he’s too focused on the truths that he thinks he’s unlocking in his own mind having had the same radical procedure as the dead woman from the beginning and the suicidal cop. she manages to stay with him for a short while until he gives her the old mulder ditch. it’s an exceptionally rude ditch, too, leaving her at his mother’s after he had an awkward argument with her. mulder goes back for some more head drilling and scully can’t get to him in time. she tracks him down to his family’s summer home where he pulls a gun on himself and then on her. she tries again to petition to his faith in their partnership. she says, “mulder, it’s me” hoping it will resonate in his addled brain even though he knows that it is her in the room already. in his crazed state he thinks that she is only a hindrance in his search for the truth, in his efforts to remember. “are you going to shoot me, mulder? is that how much this means to you? you don’t know if these memories are yours. this is not the way to the truth, mulder. you’ve got to trust me.” he yells for her to shut up and the camera cuts away as we hear shots fired. mulder did not shoot at scully, but emptied his clip out of painful desperation.
scully wraps up her report. there is no evidence of permanent cerebral damage, but there is emotional damage for mulder, of course, but also for scully. “by retrieving memories lost to him he might finally understand the path he’s on. but if that knowledge remains elusive and if it’s only by knowing where he’s been that he can hope to understand where he’s going then i fear agent mulder may lose his course and the truths he’s seeking from his childhood may continue to evade him driving him more dangerously forward in impossible pursuit.” this is sad and scary for mulder because it does seem to be the path he is on. it’s also heartbreaking for scully because she knows how destructive it is and yet she has committed herself to this crusade and to him. she has tethered herself to him and will, unfailingly, follow him down this dark path.
scully gets to see naked!mulder. too bad he’s suffering from shock.
the flashbacks are visually and audibly very cool.
how horrible to find the two bodies.
mulder’s mom is kind of awful. i don’t care that he’s forcing you to have an uncomfortable conversation, don’t walk away when he starts suddenly bleeding from the head. sheesh!
i’m so sad to see mulder undergo this crazy-ass procedure. scully must be wrecked to see him go to this extreme.
she hugs him after his breakdown at the end.
if pulling guns on each other is love than these two are the best couple of all time!
s: “i’m going to get you out of here.”
s: “damn it, answer me!” i love when scully gets aggressive like that. and it’s always for the sake of mulder.